Being an Artist

A​s an artist I can say that I see the world a little different from most people around me; and when it comes to writing my mind is a blur with words. This isn’t to say that I can’t look at events or even simple objects in the simplest of terms, it means I see a deeper meaning behind the occurrence or object.; l​ike the great mathematician that sees numbers in their head, I look for words that fit together and make something whole.

M​any a night I spend lying in bed with words flowing through my head, and how to put them together into something meaningful that people will enjoy reading. I feel as though this is a curse sometimes because it makes it hard to sleep; and drives my focus away from other tasks at hand, for example, work…oh dreaded work, but I wouldn’t trade it for the world. 

W​hen I was younger I would scribble words and sentences onto a scratch piece of paper; and keep them hidden from the world, for they were mine. I felt embarrassed that it wasn’t good enough for the world to see how I feel about the world around me, but now I can’t get enough…it’s almost like a drug. 

A​s I grew older I was more serious about my writing and started to write pieces that had deeper meaning, and more personal to my life and feelings. I started delving into dark places and emotions; places I had never been or expressed before, but there I was letting emotions flow out onto a sheet of paper. This was a therapeutic time for me, but still I didn’t share these memoirs of my emotions, with anyone out there.

I like to call the next stage of my writing ‘The Dark Ages’, this period of writing was a period that I didn’t write much, and my writing was sporadic. The words that used to float in my head were blocked, and no words were floating in my head like in the past. It felt like everything was being pushed away, life took over from what I truly enjoyed, the dark ages.

M​y current stage of writing I like to call the awakening; and it’s filled with challenges and experimenting with different forms of writing. I write poetry about my feelings and personal experiences. My goal with most of my writing is to make it personal, and I am the first to admit that I don’t write in a particular classic style, but I write. Since March of last year I have written 340 posts, and that is no small feat for me. This new stage has also allowed me to move beyond writing and including other passions of mine like photography and music, this is a glorious time for me as an artist, and I am grateful. 

B​eing an artist, because that is how I see myself, has provided me with the opportunity to see the world in an entirely different light, and deeper than the surface clutter we see every day.

© Chris Chonos